Sneeze Acknowledgement Protocol

It's getting to be that time of the year when everyone seems to be getting a cold. Among other annoying symptoms, these colds have us all sneezing. For some reason in our culture sneezes must be acknowledged with some form of "God bless you". According to straightdope.com this practice dates back to the plague.

Now I'm more of a "Gesundheit!" guy myself and would be fine without any sneeze acknowledgement in the first place, but I have accepted it as part of our society's collection of arbitrary mores (like handshake greetings, tipping servers, and pretending we're interested in hearing stories about our coworkers' kids).

My problem is this: I'm not what you would call a traditional sneezer. I rarely sneeze in twos. I usually sneeze in threes or sometimes fours. This creates problems dealing with those who I refer to as aggressive sneeze acknowledgers. You may know one of these people (or even be one yourself): halfway through the 2nd (and for traditional sneezers, final) sneeze, this person has already begun blessing you. This makes for an exchange like the following:

Me: Ah-ah-ah-achoo! [Pause] Achoo!
Aggressive Sneeze Acknowledger: Bless you!
Me: [Struggling to catch my breath] Thanks. Achoo!
ASA: Bless you again!
Me: [Again, struggling to catch my breath] Thanks. Achoo!
ASA: Wow, bless you!
Me: Thanks.

Not that I don't appreciate the blessings, I do. But those of us that sneeze in threes and fours have a difficult enough time getting through our extended sneezing fits without the pressure of expressing an appropriate amount of gratitude for each blessing.

So please, aggressive sneeze acknowledgers of the world, do us non-traditional sneezers a solid and try and wait for us to finish our sneezing session before your acknowledgement. We appreciate your concern and will gladly thank you when we are done.